


End of the line

by seb_rogerbarnes



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, S.H.I.E.L.D. (Comics), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Betrayal, Canon Divergence, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Slow Romance, World War II
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-28
Updated: 2017-09-28
Packaged: 2019-01-06 11:37:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12210525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seb_rogerbarnes/pseuds/seb_rogerbarnes
Summary: The story that history did not record. Bucky remembers bits while Steve remembers clearly...what life was like with Bucky Barnes as his best friend. Only, both remember differently. They loved each other, for sure but just differently. Now when life gives them a second chance to rebuild thier friendship as different persons, Steve and Bucky learn of how 'co-incidental' it was that both landed up being super soldiers.





	End of the line

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone!! I am relatively new to the fandom...and this is my first attempt at fanfic! Given my personal preference, I have opted for a slightly slow pacing of the romance that would unfold over a century. Please comment and help me improve! Hopefully, will put up 2-3 chapters weekly:)

End of the line

As far back as he remembered, James had always been well built. He had been a star in school, having tons of friends, followers and worshippers. However, when exactly had he become a bully, he did not remember. His gang of pals were not exactly sadists but they relished going after anyone who caught their fancy, strong or weak, girl or boy. They were not overly cruel but those who had the misfortune of being their target once became social outcasts till the next one came in. James had just looked, had not interfered, neither in the pranks nor for the benefit of the bullied.

However, these days everything seemed different to him. He could enjoy nothing. He hated nothing. It was almost as he felt no emotion which was rather odd given how much he used to love being loved, being the greatest hero for some and villain for others. But then, since the war had started, life and death seemed to him banal. His father was missing but it seemed to matter to none. He had grieved in private for months till there were no more tears to shed. However, when he thought of enlisting himself, this very strong urge to protect his family, to be the guardian of them had engulfed him. Now he felt his mother and sisters were stronger than him. They would do well even with him gone. That just made him more despondent than ever.

 He could never shake off how brave his father had been when the last big war had occurred. James was barely four at that time. His father had been at the forefront then. And in the years after the war, he had been working hard as the head scientist in a government agency. But he never spoke about work at home, and James never asked. It was only when they had received his file and belongings months ago, did he realise how little he knew of his father apart from him being a loving and protective head of the family. No, James had been too busy with this own life, and he had every reason to be. Now, when that reason too was lost, James was not very sure of where to look next. He fell back to reminiscing that day, four years ago, when his life began to change.

1936, Brooklyn

The day was sunny after weeks of gloomy rain. The grey skies had cleared just in time for school to reopen and James was ready to leave home for the small apartment that he had rented along with four of his friends. It wasn’t much, but enough for them have fun. His appearance had altered too. For months now, he had been doing hard physical work at a construction site to get himself into shape and to earn some extra cash. Of course, his parents didn’t know. But the results had been impressive. His dark brown hair was longer and he had begun tying it roughly last month. He also sported a slight stubble. It made him look a little older and more mature. James hated the look. But he had been complimented to be pretty way too many times last year with his clean shaven face and gelled hair. James like it that way, complete with his suit, but so did a lot of other men and women and he did not want that much attention this time around.

“James Buchanan Barnes” Sam called out his name with excitement. “Don’t you look dashing?” James laughed at his friend as they joined others in the alley behind the school. This was their hanging out spot where they fashioned themselves as lords and terrified newcomers. Every day, there was one or the other boy or girl, made meek by all the tales floating around in school, all too ready to pay up quietly. Some had actually become friends later and joined the gang as members graduated. But till now, no one had spoken out against them, neither in their faces nor behind their backs. The consequences could only be speculated.

On that bright afternoon, two girls walked in the alley. They were tall and confident. Funnily, one of them was walking in too eagerly. James was sitting on the side, in his usual spot, eyeing the girls with curiosity, when he noticed the third person behind them. It was a man, who looked as if he had stopped growing earlier than usual. He was 5’4” and not more than 100lbs. Well dressed in a white buttoned shirt, light brown trousers and black shoes, it was his face that captured James’s attention. His blond hair were neatly partitioned and fell slightly over his calm forehead. His smooth pale skin was too well suited to his sparkling blue eyes. The man looked at James for a second and in that moment, James felt as if he had pierced right into his soul. It was just a flicker before that feeling was replaced by understanding. That’s why the girls were so confident. They knew they were not going to be the targets today.

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Chapter 2

“Steven Rogers” The little guy said clearly. The girls had been sent back promptly, as James had anticipated. He turned his attention towards Rogers who was facing his friends now. They were all standing up, may be to intimidate him more. Steve’s chin was up in a defiant way as a wrestling match was ordained by Tony, who was the de facto leader of the group. Martha, who happened to be Tony’s burly girlfriend was to be the opponent. A small crowd had gathered by now. As everyone started cheering, James thought ‘this should be fun’. He was lost looking at Rogers’ aquiline nose and the sweat dripping from his now creased forehead when he realised that everyone was looking at him expectantly. Lost in his thoughts, James completely missed the announcement that Martha was sick and therefore he would take over the match. Confused for a moment, James said yes. It was only when he was standing in the centre of the swelling crowd, staring into those blue eyes almost a foot below his, that he realised what he had volunteered for.

It was an uncharacteristically volatile minute for James. He knew not why but suddenly, he wanted to be wicked and punch the hell out of this tiny man. He just wanted to use all strength he had and crush that perfectly symmetrical face that exuded defiance. Rogers arms were up, his fingers curled in defence and his legs a little shaky. ‘It would take just a minute’ James thought. His friends’ rowdy comments were now ringing in his ears but his eyes were concentrated, nay they were drowning in the clear blue depth of Steven’s eyes. There he sensed fear, the kind that arises when you know of the impending loss but cannot give up for want of self-respect. James had often mocked such a sentiment, a sign of weakness and denial of one’s own personality. ‘Yes’, James thought, ‘he is the perfect target’ and raised his fist to hurt Rogers.

Barely minutes later, he was running, as fast as he could. James was pulling Rogers along, though it seemed like his legs would give away at any moment. He knew that tomorrow he would have to answer a lot of questions. But, at that time, only one thing mattered. He could not let Steve be beaten by himself or by anyone else. They stopped after having crossed almost ten blocks. Nobody had followed them. Breathing hard, James looked up and saw Steve sitting on the edge of the pavement, a soft smile on his face. Almost automatically, James grinned and introduced himself “James Buchanan Barnes. Nice to meet you, Stevie” Now smiling brightly, Rogers said “I can call you Bucky?” No one had called James that, but he liked the sound of it, as if it resonated with who he really was.

Bucky was grateful that Steve hadn’t asked him why they had run away. But they were talking soon enough about all things under the sun. Steve had lived in Bucky’s neighbourhood only. But home schooled and frequently sick, Steve was almost invisible to other boys and girls. He had a few friends and a doting mother. Bucky listened intently and talked about himself as carefree as possible. He felt as if like family, there would be no judgement from Steve. Slowly, as the sun was setting, Bucky began observing Steve closely. His thin and long fingers were smudged with charcoal as all this while he had been sketching in the tiny notebook he carried. With his neat clothes and calm demeanour, Steve looked like a complete gentleman.  His eyes on the other hand, were a different matter altogether. It seemed as if they were changing hues from clear blue to a slight tinge of green and golden occasionally. As if they were expressing the tumult in his head- from fear to sadness to unbridled joy- his eyes shared it all.

Bucky knew something was very wrong about the situation. He felt as if he was courting trouble Worse, he wanted to do it.

                            --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 3

Steve loved staying outdoors. As a kid he had spent entire days away from home, in farms with his aunt, playing with kids from the neighbourhood. His best friend, Natasha, was a redhead. She was agile and Steve had loved her dry sense of humour and her beatific smile. He was 12, when everything started going south. He developed asthma and lost a lot of weight as his heart too became weak. Soon enough, when all his class mates were hitting puberty and growing taller, he had become stuck at 5’4” which was shorter than many girls. If things could be any worse, Natasha had to move to Europe with her family. Steven would have been lonely and pathetic, but for his mother. She was a beautiful woman with unfathomable mental strength. As a single parent, she had given Steve the best education possible, took personal interest in his affairs and was always kind to everyone around. She often brought home kids orphaned in the war and fed them and often even trusted them with her trading business. Steve adored her and was never shy of being called a Mama’s boy.

His home schooling began at the age of 14. He was randomly joined by kids from the lane. Despite missing his time outdoors, Steve took solace in his mother’s company. He, however, started feeling distant from other kids. From being a friend, he became first the one who was pitied to one who was bullied. He always fought back and came home with bruises and a broken heart. Occasionally, he wrote to Natasha, but never received an answer. May be, she too had made better friends.                 It was one of such day, when Steve met a brown haired gentleman walking hurriedly in the alley. He had lost a valuable piece of paper and was tracing back his steps Steve wondered at his energy, given he was quite old and had a prosthetic leg made of wood. ‘It must be really painful’, Steve thought. Shyly, he approached the man and asked if he needed some help. The boys nearby had started laughing by then. Steve was the one who needed help. All the time. The man had however had nodded and after five hours they found a paper on which something was written in German. It was signed by one Dr. Erskine. Steve was thanked profusely by the elderly man, who introduced himself as Dr Alexander Barnes. “Steve Rogers”, he replied. Steve never met him again.

‘Today will be a new start’, Steve thought.

 He was starting college and his mother was ecstatic. Steve wanted things to remain that way. He put on his most inconspicuous clothes but of course his mother had other plans. He obliged. Wearing the white shirt and brown pants, he entered his college lawns. They were mostly dry, but to Steve, looked spectacular. He could breathe freely for the first time in years. He had a strong urge to open his sketch book, sit by a tree and draw. He was fiddling his hand in his satchel to find the charcoal when suddenly his heart skipped a beat. A few metres away, he was captivated by the sight of the most beautiful person he had ever seen. Though it was not often that he looked up at people near him, but this man was hard to miss. He was tall and well-built, his brown hair unkempt and he had a most charming smile on his face. He was talking animatedly with his friends, all of whom were huge. Steve realised he had been looking too long and quickly walked ahead to meet other freshmen. Some people were really kind to him, most ignored him, while others gave him a sympathetic look. But no one was ready, Steve noted, to see him as an equal. ‘College should be good’ Steve thought wryly.

It was sometime in the afternoon, when Steve was done for the classes for the day and was sketching randomly that he was summoned to the alley behind the school along with two girls. He complied and walked out behind them.

 It was here, he saw him again. An unusual sense of familiarity swept over him as he glanced over the man sitting on the side. Despite him being a member the gang, Steve felt secure in the presence of the brunet.

He was very surprised when a few minutes later he found the man looking straight into his eyes with contempt and his fists raised in anger. Steve, out of habit had his arms up in defence, but fear, like never before, swept over him.

It was late in the evening when he finally reached back home. He felt elated. A smile was playing on his lips as he thought about his day. Bucky and he had nothing in common and yet they had become friends.  That their friendship was just a day old, even lesser, was not very important for Steve. He had made a friend for the first time in _years,_ and he would do all to keep his friend.

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Chapter 4

Bucky knew he never enjoyed the company of women as much as his friends did. But he loved hanging out with Jane because she was such a sweet heart and would never let out his secret. He liked men and was in no position to tell anybody or the audacity to actually be in a relationship with other men. He had never known a homosexual and of course, he would never ask.

He was walking to class with Jane when he saw Steve sitting on the staircase, his nose buried in a book titled “Brave New World”. From his expression, it didn’t look like it was a pleasant read at all. Running up to him, Bucky said “Hi Steve, meet my friend, Jane.” Steve looked up straight into Jane’s perfect smile. ‘Jesus, why are all these people so beautiful’, he thought as he shook hands with Jane. He couldn’t believe his fortune for the next few hours, as he sat in the class with the probably the most popular people and cracked jokes without a glitch. Turned out, because James’ gang had never intended to beat him up…they were just a bunch of scary looking pranksters, who sometimes got in actual fights. Bucky (along with some others) thought they were bullies and was always sensitive towards their targets. Thus they were not very surprised when Bucky had simply run away with Steve.

‘Thank God they think that’s the reason’, Bucky said to himself.

 The next few days, whenever he met Steve, they just talked. Steve gained enough courage to try some sports, but realised his folly as he sat down panting. So he stuck to sketching as Bucky and others played basketball. Jane often joined him. He loved talking to her. She was very intelligent and even though she was majoring in Physics, she was always keen to discuss international affairs, politics and war with Steve.

 “There will be war again. With Hitler and the Nazi party of his doing so well and France and England quiet, there is no way this is going to end peacefully” Jane claimed one day as she sat down next to him, with newspaper in hand. “I will join the army, then” Steve replied. Some fellows near them smirked and laughed. “No No No buddy, that is not happening! We can’t afford to lose a national treasure like you”, Bucky remarked as he settled himself next to Jane. He was grinning from ear to ear. “We’ll see about that. But for now, I am very contended without a war. The depression was enough of a travesty to now see innocent people die” Steve said.

It had been months since Bucky and Steve had been friends. Steve adored Bucky. He was sincere _and_ funny, very tough yet sensitive. Steve felt as if he had known him all his life. But then there were some days, when Bucky seemed distracted, like he was trying to hide something, nay, himself. He would just walk by himself and slightly nod when others greeted him. This didn’t happen often but when it did, Steve didn’t know what to do. Bucky was his best friend and watching him so listless pained him, but Steve was scared of being intrusive. On one such day, he asked Jane “Hey. Is something wrong with Buck? I wish I could help”. “Let’s go to the Amusement Park” Jane replied instantly and with much enthusiasm. “Okay, sure” Steve would go anywhere to see Bucky be cheerful again.

‘Roller Coasters. Shit. Why didn’t I think this through?’ Steve was slightly panicking. But seeing how excited Jane was and even Bucky looked interested, he relented. It was fun. He was firmly ensconced between Jane and Bucky and held their hands tightly till his knuckles were white. “THIS IS SO GREAT!!!” Bucky yelled as they sped through the curve of the figure eight. As soon as they got down, Bucky took Steve and Jane into his signature bear hug. Later they had Hot Dogs and baked beans for dinner, ending the meal with a large ice-cream. They were leaving as the three friends noticed a redhead smiling suggestively at Bucky. Well, that he was very attractive was no secret, but Steve felt ditched when Bucky went ahead and returned a while later with the girl in his arm. Through the rest of the night, they flirted and soon disappeared as Jane and Steve walked behind talking about inconsequential things.

By the time Bucky returned at the decided spot, Jane had already left, Steve had eaten two more hot dogs and the train station was almost empty. Bucky was also carrying a rather large pink teddy bear in his left arm. Steve, though tired, grinned at him “Did you exchange the redhead for a pink one?” “Nah, bought it for Dats, but she left it with me. She’ll take it on our next meet” Bucky said with a wink. “Okay, now buy us two tickets” Steve replied. Its then they realised that none had enough money left.

“Damn, it’s cold! I’m freezing” Bucky complained as they made their way home in the back of an open truck. Steve was shivering too. He looked at the teddy bear and remarked “Ask Pinky to warm you up”. Bucky looked conflicted for a second, before he quickly pulled Steve into an embrace. Holding each other would keep them warm, at least. Steve smiled and quickly dozed off on Bucky’s shoulder, the smile still lingering on his face. ‘God. He’s beautiful’ Bucky gave Steve a quick peck on his forehead before he too fell asleep.


End file.
